Pay for Movies!? Really!?

Haven't made a post in a while. You could say I've been exploring, experimenting...with everything but writing.

Funny thing, I just started reading this blog from a stripper and what do you know, it inspired my ass to make a much needed post.

Hmmm. This past summer went by with a yawn as far as movies go. Funny thing you don't see people worshiping new movies like they used to. I remember when movies used to actually stay number one on the box office for over 4 weeks. Now you're lucky to see a new film last 2 weeks at Number one. Not like it matters. But to the general public it matters.

I usually make a post about a certain film, whether I liked it or not. But if I did that it would be constant post like the one I did about the Expendables. Honest to god I haven't seen a "blockbuster hit" that was anything worth the $11.00 one has to pay NYC.

Then again I have yet to see "The Town" or "The Social Network". And yes, Inception was pretty good (even though I fell asleep...not because the movie sucked but because I was tired from DJing all day...not good to watch a movie about dreams if you're already tired lol).

Movies that I thought were going to be interesting but weren't:

Salt: Wow, what a way to make a film suck. Even Jolie's Hotness couldn't help this sad excuse for an action plot. If you go with a girl to see this you'll both leave the theater with question marks on your heads about what the hell was going on.


Predators: I love Robert Rodriguez (and he only produced), and this film had so much potential, but man, what a let down.

Machete: Had to follow up with this being that Rodriguez did actually direct this film. Though it had some good points it wasn't nearly as cool or entertaining as Black Dynamite (a film that is pretty much on the same level as Machete).

Piranha 3D: Cool effects but after a while you start to get bored of blood in the water and naked girls. Get a plot and good dialog for the next one (yes they are making a sequel lol).

The Sorcerer's Apprentice: And I usually like Nick Cage. This film lacks any sort of pacing. They butchered it in the editing room as once everything was in the can they realized that they didn't have anything at all.


I'd write more but I'm due for a nap before my Wed Salsa Night ;)

The Expendables

Just peeped the Expendables flick this past Thursday. Being a very faithful lover of "Man" action flicks I really wanted to like this film. I like Stallone. I liked his recent Rambo movie (Rambo 4), thought it was fresh/raw and pretty entertaining. Good action and acting from the whole cast. Back to the Expendables. The film fell very flat on almost every point you could doctor up.

This is one of those films you'll watch and say, "yeah, he needs to retire..."
I felt the only actors who did alright in the whole film (or were allowed to dabble) were Jason Stathem and Dolph Lungren. Working mad long hours lately I found myself having to fight to stay awake/keep interested.

I really want movie studios to keep on the track of making "man movies." Straight up hardcore Rated R action flicks that aren't supposed to be about getting asses in seats (notice how every movie now a days is pg or pg-13, because they make more money that way). And maybe with the success of how well Expendables is doing at the box office they will continue to do so.

At least one good thing about this movie lol. Seriously, I thought this movie was so bad that everyone was going to rip it to shreds. Sometimes I chuckle at the way films are received by the general public.

But then again I really am living in my own world.

Crazyheart Review

Wow, def an interesting run for me this month. Just saw Crazy Heart with Jeff Bridges. Funny thing too. I was soooo not wanting to check it out but yet again I was like "Alright, just for a couple of minutes." Just the night before I'd put on the new Benicio Del Torro "Wolfman" flick (What? My Friend works for a major distributor...yeah, what can I say, if you're a film buff figure out a way to not have to pay for that ish ;-) and was literally falling asleep after 15 minutes. Wolfman was a pathetic excuse for getting butts in theatre seats. Crazy Heart on the other hand was a film goers wet dream. Excellent from the first frame to the last.

Sad thing is the Marketers for Crazy Heart had it all wrong. The movie preview for Crazy Heart put my ass to sleep. They seemed to be marketing for a 45 years and older crowd. There was no way I was going to see that film, even if Bridges himself called me up and was like "Hey Achilles, come see my new film..."

Then again maybe that's why the film was a total surprise to me. Seriously, after watching this film I literally have a new respect for Country music. Having lived in Texas for over 14 years I hated Country Music. Seriously HATED it. I still do, but after watching this movie I'm like "Alright, I won't judge anymore."

Everyone of the cast members was brilliant. The flow of the film was great and yes, you could say that in this film Jeff Bridges is like an older Big Lebowski (which is mad cool if you loved watching the Big Lebowski like I did, and still do ;-).

Bridges really shows his amazingness here. Then again I find him to have always been a very exceptional actor.

PLOT:

Bridges plays 'Bad Blake', a famed country singer who's past his prime and looking like his next gig is going to be in a casket. We see him at his worst driving in a beat up suburban from shitty gig to shitty gig. He still has an agent and he can still rock a show. The man has talent and integrity (which is what pretty much gets him through the whole movie...in a good way though... as it shows that hard work can build integrity, and with integrity you really are nothing).

He's an alcoholic, who lives what he writes and sings, comes with the territory. Through the film we see all the characters in Crazyheart having to change there ways to cater to their environments. Bad Blake decides to stay the same, from not wanting to put out new songs, or stop drinking etc. and in the end we see how much this will have an effect on his well being, and survival at that.

We know men like Blake far too well. He could be your Uncle or Cousin or even your Father. There's a bit of Bad Blake in all of us.

Why write about this film?

I don't even like Country music yet this movie def makes me keep an open to appreciating someones craft. I guess since I'm an artist myself I'm very keen to watch who and what I judge. I basically make it a point in my life to NEVER judge. Whether it's music, religion, sexual beliefs etc. Judging will get you in trouble, except when watching movies and seeing if they sucked balls or not ;-P

Who to watch this with:

Any super smart and witty film goer who understands and appreciates good drama and acting.

Cool chicks who appreciate good art and who are super hot and don't wear granny panties.

Positive high energy people.

Who not to watch this with:

Girls who wear Granny Panties, or who are boring. Someone who doesn't have a sense of humor. Older people who have a chip on their shoulder. People who are always feeling sorry about themselves.

Movie Review: Gone Baby Gone

Just finished watching a movie with one of the worst titles ever: Gone baby Gone.

But don't worry, the fact that this is one amazing film makes up for it, tenfold. As far as the title goes they could have named it "Jar Jar Binks is Back" and it wouldn't have mattered. This film holds its own: Originality, Directing, Acting, Cinematography...the list goes on and on.

Why am I writing about it when tons of good films come out each year and get the notoriety they "deserve", i.e proper marketing campaign? Because being in the age demographic of 21-30 I heard squat about this film. Matter a fact I'm wondering if this movie was only marketed to senior citizens who watch Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune every night at 6:30pm (eastern standard time). Sure I don't tend to ever "want" to watch thriller and dramas about kids being kidnapped but maybe that's why I found this film to be so amazing. For the fact that it was all of the above and turned out to be one of the most interesting films I've seen since Children of Men or District 9 (Two films that have nothing to do with GBG's genre).

It takes alot for me to post up a film on this blog. Seriously, movies are reviewed and reviewed over and over again whether good or bad. And yes, I watch almost all of them (because I simply enjoy watching movies), but for me to sit and write about it. Yes, shit better be cathartic...epic.

PLOT:

Cassey Affleck (In one of the best performances I've seen him portray ever in a movie since his bit part in Good Will Hunting) plays a sort of Private detective who helps find missing children/people with his Girl friend/partner Michelle Monaghan. When a child from the area is, you guessed it, missing, they child's Uncle and wife seek Affleck's services. As Affleck goes about investigating everything isn't what it seems to be. And yes, all hell breaks loose with Affleck caught right in the middle.

This movie had me sucked in from the first 5 minutes. Having just done an IMDB search 20 seconds ago I have just found that this film was directed by Ben Affleck. This is shocking to me. Very shocking. I went into this film not knowing who the hell directed it. Why I even wanted to watch it is still making me wonder (other than the fact that I saw that it had high ratings on IMDB and then having read the review by MikeKuch, which was awesome btw, I decided to give it a shot). I seriously love watching anything that Entertains and movies like this usually do the opposite.

WHY:

This movie will make you think about what's REALLY right and what's REALLY wrong. Do you have what it takes to do the right thing? And is the right thing to do REALLY the right thing to do? Can you live with and stand by the decisions you make when everyone (including those who you love and love you back) is against you...when those closest to you will more than likely alienate you.

Well acted with an all star A-list cast (and no name cast that also did an astounding job) that includes Morgan Freeman, Ed Harris, and the fat dude cop who was in Beverly Hills Cop 2 and 3.

I personally love films that make me think about "What if this was me in that situation, or what if I knew people like this, how would I feel?" and GBG does that, flawlessly.

Just when you think the film is going end in the good ol' fashioned way we've seen all these types of films play out it quickly slaps you in the face with some "Hell No Muthafucka, this shit here is Original, Enjoy!!" and makes you sit back and say, "Damn, that felt good, thank you for bringing some clever amazingness to the table..." and then it makes you think that those in Hollywood actually do make decent decisions when making films and not all films in Hollywood are designed to appease the masses, i.e the people who don't like to think, or read and like watching reality TV more than actually trying to live in the Real Life.

Who to watch this film with:

Alone when everyone is asleep and all is quiet. With another serious film watcher who appreciates films like such. The fewer the people the better. This film is not what I would call a crowd pleaser. It will surface alot of guilt in everyone (and believe me, if you're over 21 you've definitely made some mistakes in life that made you think twice "doing" or not "doing" the "right thing."

Who not to watch this film with:

Anyone younger than 21 (unless they are very mature and act like an older person).

Girls you're trying to lay that same night (Go ahead and watch it with them if you've already had sex ;-)

Friends from High school or College. Parents.

The Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans

There comes time when a movie just knocks me off my feet. Maybe I was expecting something and it gave me the opposite reaction which is why I was more or less shocked etc. Maybe it's got my fav actor/actress, or Director/Producer. Regardless of all that I came across The Bad Lieutenant and must say that it is one of the best films I've seen this fucking year.

Inglorious Bastards was great, District 9 was fucking amazing. The Bad Lieutenant, in my opinion, is just as amazing, if not more so than those two huge blockbusters. Sure I'm being a dick in trying to compare movies that have nothing to do with this genre, but fuck that, it's a bad ass movie that deserves props. If you like Nicolas Cage but hated how he was making whack ass movies Post Face Off (though the Lord of War was pretty amazing as well ;-) then you'll love this movie.

Hell, this movie is so good that I vote for this muthafucka to get best actor at the Oscars.


Plot:

The film is set in New Orleans post Katrina where Louisiana is still picking from all the prior chaos. Cages character Terrance is a damn good Detective who does things a bit on the illegal side when it comes to getting justice to be served. There are plenty of times in the movie where I'm like "this dude is evil." But yes, he's an anti hero to the exponent of 50.
Some cases that need to be solved, Terrance's involvement in some stuff that would make anybody else with out a confident frame jump off a bridge from the pressure, and some great twists and turns make this a quite refreshing film for the Crime/Drama genre.

This film takes all the stereo types in most of these movies and literally gives them an amazing uplift. The dad who drinks himself to death, the prostitute with the heart of gold etc... but they are all the most so interesting and complex in this film.


Cast:

Amazingly cast. Cage carries the whole film on his shoulders and succeeds very well at it.
There's something about a movie that has a very strong male lead. Eva Mendes is mad hot and does a great job at playing her part. Hell, every actor from Val Kilmer to fucking Xzibit did an awesome job.


The film is directed by German legend Werner Herzog. I don't remember what he made off the top of my head (Grizzly Man, Rescue Dawn) but I can remember in my German's in Hollywood class when my instructor talked about him. Gave the man nothing but praise. And after seeing this movie (I wasn't to impressed with Grizzly Man) I steadfastly apologize for ever doubting his artistic creativity.


Why Cage's Character is the Man:

Yeah he's got flaws, and pretty sick ones at that (he's a coke addict and takes pain killers for a bad back, smokes crack, steals from the evidence room etc.) but one thing he never falters on is his ability to never break his frame when ever crazy shit hits the fan. He's a guy who stands up to anything and anyone. And this is what women are crazy about. No he's not picking up mad chicks in this film but the ones that he does have, you can bet that they aren't going any where any time soon. More so they're ready to do crazy shit for him if need be.
How can you tell when a man is grounded down to the root? Put him in the position that Cages character and watch him come out without even shitting a brick and handling every situation hands down that comes his way.



This Film is by far one of the most clever, well written, films of its kind.



Who to watch this movie with:

People who love smart vulgar films. Anyone over 17 who's into kinky shit and free minded about things like drugs and sex. Definitely watch it with girls you're trying to hook up with.


Who not to watch this movie with:

Anyone who's very religious. Your Parents (though my parents are kind of cool so it wouldn't be bad to watch it with them), especially if they haven't even acknowledged or even asked that you're having sex with other women/men yet.

Four Christmas

So it's coming around to that time of Xmas and the holidays. Just had TG dinner and it was immaculate so I thought I'd sit back and watch a Holiday themed film (and yes, there wasn't anything else on to watch at the moment so why not broaden my horizons and jump back into the one field of film genre I usually tend to avoid: the screwball Comedy ;-). But wow was I surprised at how good Four Christmas actually was.

Who ever created the screen play "gets it." Watch the first 5 minutes of the movie and you'll understand what I mean....which is...We see both of our main characters interact and it's sheer genius: in a nut shell Vince Vaughn's character Brad walks up to Witherspoon's Kate and tries to pick her up. He uses all the basic boring "Interview" questions to get her interacting and she's blowing him off. Then he turns it around, starts being a very cocky self confident man, and literally says everything that, in actuality, does spark attraction (though very comedically vulgar, if said in the right tonality it will get you results etc.). We soon see that they actually knew each other but the way it was played out was genius, and from what I've seen and experienced out in the Social meat market I can say that what Vince Vaughn says to Reese Witherspoon in this film is what sparks attraction in women.

I've been dragged to my fair share of shit chick flick disasters by my older sisters and female friends and this film was not one of them.

To the critics:

Yeah, it got a bad wrap on IMDB. I guess people who actually like to see chick flicks were probably shocked and disgusted. But you could say that this film just gained another fan for the genre.

Why? Because this film is balanced. Watch Ghosts of girlfriends past, watch How to lose a guy in ten days, watch bride wars (which I saw like the first 10 minutes and then had to stop so I could go and watch grass grow). All those films have the same thing in common: They really make the male feel guilty as fuck for not conforming to what today's social norms really push for. It really makes the girls feel like dumbasses for sleeping with more than one guy.

Is it me or did every conservative American out there forget that it's 2009 and people like to have sex ;-)

By no means am I talking about a revolution and totally endorsing films that promote sexual options with plenty of partners (safely). I'm simply saying to stop brainwashing women and men by feeling guilty with what those films are instilling, which is: Get married, have kids.... blah blah blah...

Understand the reason why most chick flicks are super horrible to watch with anyone you would like to have sex with afterwards is that it they are very unbalanced and make the male feel mad guilty about not "poppin the question" or "Settling down", and make the female feel very guilty for wanting to fuck every cool guy that hits on her (I'm indifferent and choose not to judge on either spectrum, but understand that the pendulum swings both ways).

And I know these films are made independently etc. What I want to know is why more films like "Four Christmas" aren't being green lit to help balance out the influx of "Couples Retreat" and "Twilight: New Moon." Sure, Money might be a plausible answer but I think it def more complex than that.

Four Christmas is a film about "Honesty" both with yourself and your significant other and what it takes to get to that level. Not living in denial and being able to trust and respect one another.
You see all spectrums of life from each person our main characters run into, from the poor couples to the rich couples to the divorced older people (Yes, in this movie it's understood that people do get divorced and move on etc.). You see how each couple, no matter what sort of income they have, interact with each other, and it's almost real with how they acted it all out. Real is what you make of it but I did like how this film didn't try to hit people over the head with the whole "You need to have a secure job and good education in order to have a good family...."
Those traits do obviously help when trying to form a family but understand that without Trust, honesty, and respect for one another, money and a good resume will only get you so far.


Beautifully written and amazingly Cast. I thought Vince Vaughn to be a wash out doing the same ol renditions (which he still kind of does) but his performance in this film could be easily compared to that of Wedding Crashers or even the first Swingers. Reese Witherspoon was hilarious. Never saw this coming from someone like her (American Psycho, Legally Blond). On screen they had a quite a dynamic that made you wondering what they were going to say next.

As the movie progresses we begin to see each Vaughn's and Witherspoon's characters' flaws that they'd tried to keep from one another in order to look more attractive. And they had a pretty good thing going for a while until spending a couple of hours with their family members made them realize how whack it was to be living a lifestyle of fakeness (Her character never even knew Vaughn's real name etc.)

Yeah, the ending was sort of Hollywooded up but everything flowed very well in this movie. Not too long, not too short. And I can't help but big up the Diaglogue. Soooo Good ;-)

Alot of men and women who are trying to "Better" themselves, become their "best selves" will relate to this film. One like thing: I loved how this film dealt with some pretty crazy topics dealing with self esteem etc. and still was able to keep it upbeat. There was a very nice line to what they did with the comedy and the shock and awe. Well done makes of Four Christmas. Keep up the good work ;-)



Who to watch this film with: Anyone you're looking to hook up with after wards. Friends, Family. People who like to see interesting movies etc.


Who Not to watch this film with: Anyone who doesn't like to have a good time. Immature women who think sex should only be had during marriage. People who don't get good humor.
Super Religious people.

Twilight: New Moon Review

I've never read the books (for you die hard Twilight fans who just read that sentence, let that allow you to stop reading...then again allow me to instill the "you don't have to try crack to know that it's bad for you" arguement)...but hells no is that going to stop me from writing about this (I used 1.3 hours of my time to watch so now here's the trade off).

Yeah, I didn't read the novel but that doesn't mean I have no idea what the word "Entertaining" means.

There's a great term I learned about in Production class called cross promoting/marketing etc. You write a book. The publishing company of that book (considering that it becomes a big hit) is also owned by the same people who own a movie studio and toy factory and god knows what else. There used to be a law that made it impossible to be able to use cross promoting/marketing etc. I can't recall the details but that law no longer exists and everyone is using it to their advantage (I'm have no judgement on this issue, it's simply what's happening...and frankly I can't tell if it's good or bad, nor is it my place to say so ;-)

Back to this movie in question. Well, for starters it is not an entertaining movie. Yes, the New Moon movie was pretty boring and cheesy if you ask me. Should you shocked? May be not lol. While watching I couldn't help but notice the genius behind it though. They are using the same formula as the Harry Poter Series: One movie per book. And it's working amazingly. This movie gave me nothing more than that of "Please wait for the next film to come to find out what happens next." Hell. Pretty damn genius.

The first movie I can think of that had the balls to pull the whole "We're going to end this movie with a fat 'To be contnued' sign on it" was Back to the future II into Back to the future III. And man was I livid when that happened. Imagine having seen BTTF II in the theatre and having that happen. People must have rioted. But now it's regular for that to happen. And that's exactly what this 4 part book series Twilight is doing.

Personally it's whack, but for die hard 13 year old teenie bopper fans who the love the fact that their favorite characters are now on the big screen, I understand that all logic understanding on what makes a good movie is out the window for them. They're more likely to care about how cool the Vampire guy Edward looks in his clothes or how awesome it is to be Vampire etc.

WHY am I reviewing this movie?

Becuase I want to warn everyone from having to go see it with their significant other. From what I hear the novels are very very "Teen Romance." As in, if you love watching the Day time soaps on TV you'll probably love the New Moon. Why? Because in the course of 1.3 hours NOTHING HAPPENS. Well, things happen but it's more like "TV Show" happens. TV episodes have this sort of pace where they want to keep the viewers watching for the next week. Only with Films it's kind of whack because you have to literally wait another year.

Yes, there are movies that did a great job in giving the viewers enough to chew on to where they can wait for the next sequel with out feeling robbed (District 9 is a great example of this...sequel or no sequel it stands on its own as a quite good film from start to finish ;-).

Twilight is heavy on the Romeo and Juliet love formula. Bella loves Edward just as he yearns for her. The sexual tension stems from the fact that he is vampire and she is a human which basically makes her meat for him and his vampire peeps. They go the whole movie trying to figure that out.

Sidenote: I just went on IMDB and read some reviews, and thankfully plenty people who've read all four books are very open to mention how whack of a film it is. They hate the acting, the dialogue etc. Take it from a fresh mind who has no idea what the series is about: It's simply a bad film, but if that's not enough for you take it from the die hard book fans who also couldn't stand it as a movie. The reason why bring this is up is because I love it when people use the whole "You haven't read the novels so you wouldn't understand" argument.


It's true women love the idea of this movie and they will simply pay the money to see it because it has to do with romance and vampires. The movie made 141 million its first weekend (that's how strong the books are...they have a serious fan base...it's mind blowing really, something I'm def going to do more research on).

I ended up having to watch it with a good female friend of mine (Who I love spending time with and have known for quite a while) and boy was I falling asleep. The ending of the film (which I won't ruin) was simply bad. Bad, bad, bad. An episode of Saved by the Bell would have sufficed better than that ending.


It's films like this that make me cringe at the film industry (which is based on making money first and entertaining the people second). They'd rather put out something halfass because the schedule permits it as so and because they know that they will make a killing by playing it safe (i.e PG 13 vs Rated R etc.....why not make Twilight into a very dark serious film...push the envelope etc....). It's a fine line between making movies that are entertaining to watch and movies that designed to get butts in seats or fill venture capitalist pockets (More power to them, hell, If I'd had the opportunity to invest in a film like Twilight you're damn right I would have done it. Sure it's a high cost but the risk is very minimal, even for film standards, and the gain is very very beneficial). Fans hate the film but investors love it. LOL, go figure.

Let's get into the dynamic between the characters. Edward is the all dreamy Alpha Male Vampire who can do no wrong and is desired by all females. He's very chill yet will not hesitate to act when pushed to do so. Then you have some one like Bella who is the stereo typical 'average girl.' Every woman, and believe me when I say, EVERY WOMAN sees her herself (subconsciously) as a Bella in some way/shape/form. Watching Bella go through the motions in the film will bring back memories for all these girls who, at one point in time, had crushes of the own for guys like Edward. Maybe they were dumped or too shy to act or cheated on or the guy moved away etc...The metaphors can go on for miles. Why do you think the very average looking Kristen Stewart was cast and not a heart throb like Megan Fox (which would make guys flock to see it by the millions? Kristen Stewart is the type of actress that looks like she's going to commit suicide for someone telling her she looks fat today. Had they cast a hotter chick I could have def understood why everyone in the movie would be vying for her love and attention.

They you have the Jacob were wolf character. Even the fact that he's now a Were wold can't save him from the sad slot of Wussyness he's put himself in. It's so true what they say, how a woman isn't driven by logic but by her emotions. Everything Jacob tells her is spot on yet she ends up not listening to his warnings and choosing Edward again and again because simply put, YOU CAN'T Convince a girl with LOGIC. You've got to get down and dirty with her emotions. Guys suck at this. Many men will remain door mats for women they adore to walk all over because they cannot trigger a woman's emotions.


If you simply must watch Twilight here's something for you to do so you won't fall asleep too quick: Observe the way Edward carries himself around Bella and then observe all the other men in the film and they way they carry themselves around Bella (especially the ones who also have a thing for her) There's a big difference. She's not head over heals for Edward just because he's a vampire (but yes, that is part of the formula). My point is that every guy has his own "Vampire" in him that girls will find irresistible. It's already within you. You just have to figure out a way to get it out. You can't fake authenticity. And they is no one way to do it.



Who You Should go see this Movie with:

If you must go see it with your little Sister/cousin etc. It was created for 13 years olds, sadly enough.



DO NOT SEE IT WITH:

+ Women you are trying to get intimate with. I'm talking a girl who you've never had sex with and would like to have sex with. If you go watch it with her know that you are making it all the harder to get her naked that same day. I personally don't go to the movies with girls I'd like to get intimate with but that's a whole other topic for another thread ;-)